Drunk Ex-Pastors (general)

We begin episode #420 by commemorating the number in the most obvious way possible. We attempt to discuss Christian turning 50, and then try to talk about the World Cup for a bit. Jason does his best to explain why we’re pronouncing “Iran” correctly, and then we attempt to address Gen-Z’s itchy trigger finger when it comes to canceling people they disagree with. Biebers involve button-downs and ChapStick.

Direct download: 2022_12_01_0420.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a recap of Christian’s recent trip to England, highlighting all the ways we suck compared to them (we are better at teeth, I’ll give us that). We discuss the World Cup and the U.S. Men’s National Team, and then turn our attention to the issue of free speech, and Elon Musk’s Twitter takeover in particular. Biebers involve pedestrian protocols and cold showers.

Direct download: 2022_11_24_0419.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:28pm PST

We begin this week’s episode with a brief discussion of the recent midterm elections, lamenting how overblown expectations unduly shape our view of the outcome. We springboard from Kanye to Kyrie Irving and talk about whether or not his actions were truly antisemitic (as well as what that label even means). We talk Twitter and Elon Musk, and then share biebers involving important discussions and unannounced pop-ins.

Direct download: 2022_11_11_0418.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk EX-Pastors discussing Game of Thrones: House of the Dragon. We then turn our attention to Herschel Walker, who’s some ex-sportsball who wants to be a politician. We talk about a recent poll’s findings on the supposed decline of Christianity among Americans, as well as the idea of America as a theocracy. After talking briefly about parenthood, we share biebers involving special effects and Microsoft Word.

Direct download: 2022_11_01_0417.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:43pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with a voicemail discussing proper toilet seat etiquette. We then hear from an expert in the field of death and dismemberment about how much we should charge to cut off a pinky. We discuss (and disagree over) Ricky Gervais’s thoughts about science versus religion, and then hear from a listener about whether marriage strengthens romantic commitments. Biebers involve Spotify and traffic signals.

Direct download: 2022_10_28_0416.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with the realization that Eminem just turned 50, which leads us into a discussion about musical trends over the last several decades. We imagine how someone from the 1950s would react to being shown an iPad, and then discuss a flyer we recently received urging us to prepare for the return of Christ. We briefly touch upon vaccine hysteria, and then share biebers involving Amazon deliveries and people on TV talking to others who don’t understand them.

Direct download: 2022_10_17_0415.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we revisit our Kanye/Bieber distinction (as well as touch upon the current beef between these two morons). We discuss the docu-series “Welcome to Wrexham,” and then wonder aloud whether it would matter that much if the Earth had no helium left for birthday balloons. We contemplate how much our pinkies are worth, and then wish the #MeToo movement a happy 5th birthday.

Direct download: 2022_10_10_0414.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by shouting out a couple DXP listeners who made their way to the Well & Table this past week, and then banter a bit about nothing in particular. We discuss “Planetary Defense,” which is a recent NASA experiment in which we try to alter the trajectory of an asteroid (think the film Armageddon, only real). We talk about another experiment on the subject of “Learned Helplessness,” which explains why, when you’re down on your luck, it’s so hard to turn things around. Biebers involve icemakers expired water.

Direct download: 2022_10_02_0413.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode Jason is derided (again) for thinking he can run for five miles. We turn our attention once again to the book “4000 Weeks,” discussing the issue of cherishing the time we have on this earth and seeking novel experiences that slow time down. A caller brings up abortion, which leads into a discussion about a possibly looming civil war. Biebers involve dishonest memes and martial arts.

Direct download: 2022_09_21_0412.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with a voicemail addressing Jason’s (clearly unthought-out) claim to be able to run five miles. We then hear from Christian about his recent trip to Italy and Greece: Religious relics, victims in Pompeii, old-timey sex positions, Roman fashion, and the incredible architecture of the Pantheon and Sistine Chapel. Biebers involve pushy women and people-mover etiquette.

Direct download: 2022_09_16_0411.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:21pm PST

This episode of DXP begins with a discussion about what may become a disturbing trend regarding worker pay for remote employees. Speaking of disturbing, we then talk quite a bit about ear wax for some reason, after which we break down the ethics of euthanasia. We finish with a discussion of the so-called “male gaze” in TV and movies, wondering how bad the supposed double standard really is. Biebers involve autopay and online questionnaires.

Direct download: 2022_08_23_0410.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors by discussing the recent findings from the James Webb telescope, springboarding to the idea that there is virtue in agnosticism rather than in smug certainty. Then we return to the book “4,000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals.” We discuss issues such as finding joy in the mundane and everyday tasks of life, whether “getting ahead of ourselves” is a good or bad thing, and why so many pursuits don’t seem legit if they’re not profitable monetarily. Biebers involve surveys and slow morons.

Direct download: 2022_08_19_0409.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we discuss the book “4,000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals,” wondering aloud whether the final third of our lives is preferable to the first two-thirds due to the fact that we’re not complete morons anymore. We discuss whether the FBI’s raid of Mar-a-Lago was justified, and then end with a bieber involving annoying advertising tactics.

Direct download: 2022_08_12_0408.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we briefly discuss biblical miracles in the light of that kayaker who just got swallowed by a whale. We turn our attention to the current court case against Alex Jones, and then hear from a loyal listener who wants to fight one of us. We play another voicemail about how running 100 miles without stopping isn’t actually that hard. We revisit the issue of Hollywood’s beauty standards, and then share biebers involving milkshakes and tech.

Direct download: 2022_08_04_0407.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by discussing how rewarding it is at our age NOT to do things, but NOT to do them, if that makes sense. We talk about a recent study that calls into question what we thought we knew about chemical imbalances and depression. We wrestle with the issue of “doing our own research,” and then share biebers involving passing cars on the freeway and whether traditional meal times make sense.

Direct download: 2022_07_29_0406.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:55pm PST

We begin this episode by discussing the recent Paramount+ show, The Offer (and potentially spoil a 50-year-old film in the process). We wonder aloud whether bands know when they have a hit song, and then discuss potential plans to move to a foreign country. And we wrap up by talking about the level of brainwashing necessary to convince the populous that working 50 hours a week is a good idea. Biebers involve false praise and streaming ads.

Direct download: 2022_07_22_0405.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by discussing the recent Paramount+ show, The Offer (and potentially spoil a 50-year-old film in the process). We wonder aloud whether bands know when they have a hit song, and then discuss potential plans to move to a foreign country. And we wrap up by talking about the level of brainwashing necessary to convince the populous that working 50 hours a week is a good idea. Biebers involve false praise and streaming ads.

Direct download: 2022_07_22_0405.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by discussing the recent Paramount+ show, The Offer (and potentially spoil a 50-year-old film in the process). We wonder aloud whether bands know when they have a hit song, and then discuss potential plans to move to a foreign country. And we wrap up by talking about the level of brainwashing necessary to convince the populous that working 50 hours a week is a good idea. Biebers involve false praise and streaming ads.

Direct download: 2022_07_22_0405.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode recounting Christian’s recent travels in Alaska and Canada and move on from there to talk about The Offer, Paramount+’s new show about the making of The Godfather. We take a voice mail from a listener about whether the luxury we experience in today’s society is good for us or not. We talk briefly about how fun it is to watch The Sixth Sense with someone who’s never seen it. Biebers involve notifications and tipping dealers.

Direct download: 2022_07_15_0404.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:54pm PST

We begin this week’s episode discussing how important connection to where you grew up could be. Christian discusses his new problem of his eyes leaking when he’s happy. We play a voice mail about stuttering and then discuss a series of voice mails about whether the Bible condemns or maybe even supports abortion. We wonder if fear mongering about what the Supreme Court will do next is warranted. We end by discussing whether a new major religion is possible in the future. Biebers involve car chases and TV show extras.

Direct download: 2022_07_01_0403.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this week’s show by revisiting our discussion about Top Gun: Maverick (and hopefully clarify some things about Kelly McGillis), after which we hear from a listener about gun laws and HIPPA policies. We make a few remarks about Daylight/Standard Time, and then wonder aloud what we want to be when we grow up. Biebers involve printer ink and standing in the rain.  

Direct download: 2022_06_23_0402.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin episode #401 by wondering whether Jeff Probst has played a more significant role in our lives than we previously realized. We hear from a caller who accidentally makes incest not sound so bad, and then wonder who the Dems may run if Biden wanders off and is never heard from again. We discuss Daylight Savings Time, and then address the horrific injustice of Kelly McGillis not being cast in the new Top Gun movie. Biebers involve obliviots and Harry Potter.

Direct download: 2022_06_16_0401.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We start this episode of DXP by agreeing to keep doing this because all the freaking out about this possibly being our final show. We hear from a caller about how cell phones are the death of both comedy and drama, and we then puzzle over the size of the universe. We consider joining an outreach team that frequents strip clubs, and then hear from another listener about the abortion issue. Biebers involve showers and filthy wizards.

Direct download: 2022_06_10_0400.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we discuss the new Top Gun film, after which we turn our attention to what by now is like 10 mass shootings ago. We wrestle with the issue of survivor’s guilt, and then try to explain the Internet to an hypothetical person from the ‘80s. We hear an argument for why we’re living in a computerized simulation, and then address a common pro-choice argument. Biebers involve eyewear and streaming services.

Direct download: 2022_05_31_0399.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a voicemail about how it’s supposedly elitist to complain about cleaning ladies, and we then talk a bit about Donald Glover’s show, Atlanta, as well as Jerrod Carmichael’s comedy special, On the Count of 3. We talk stocks a bit, we hear from a longtime patron asking about why evangelical pro-lifers aren’t against IVF, and we then discuss the merits of canceling student debt. Coincidentally, biebers involve brooms and magic.      

Direct download: 2022_05_19_0398.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we (and one of us in particular) voices significant frustration at the fact that house cleaners insist on touching and moving everything you own. We discuss the looming collapse of the American Empire, and then discuss Roe v. Wade, and specifically whether any of the popular arguments for abortion actually work (and whether that even matters). Biebers involve tuna cans and mouthy restaurant patrons.     

Direct download: 2022_05_10_0397.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we hear from a listener who calls into question a very common (but apparently meaningless) phrase, after which we hear why Christian should not play the stock market. We weigh in on the potential overturning of Roe V. Wade. We discuss whether there’s a difference between making college free and canceling student debt, and then share biebers involving receipt paper and key fobs.    

Direct download: 2022_05_04_0396.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with an update on the films and TV shows we’ve been watching lately (with a focus on Severance). We discuss Elon Musk’s recent purchase of Twitter, breaking down why everyone is either rejoicing about it or having a complete meltdown. We talk Johnny Depp/Amber Heard, and weigh in on Ron DeSantis’s culture war in Florida (does CRT really teach kids to hate their country? And is that necessarily a bad thing?). Biebers involve hyperlinks and twitch streamers.   

Direct download: 2022_04_27_0395.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we hear from an angry Goonies enthusiast, and then we play a TikTok about how to use capitalism to stop police from shooting black people. We discuss the issue of contradictions in the Bible, and then springboard into a discussion of the dubious math that evangelicals employ to justify their support for Israel. We talk about our former church, Calvary Chapel, and then hear from a caller about the Victoria’s Secret model with Down Syndrome. Biebers involve Geico and the olds.   

Direct download: 2022_04_13_0393.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a voicemail from an old friend asking about the long-term effects of believing that Jesus could return at any moment. We discuss the movie about Calvary Chapel that is currently under production, and then hear from another listener asking about whether one needs to be a part of a particular demographic in order to have a valid opinion about them. We introduce the so-called Egg Theory, and then share biebers involving deadlines and TikTok.   

Direct download: 2022_04_05_0392.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode discussing the idea that “ignorance is bliss,” and then turn our attention to the various attempts of Big Tech to turn us all into human cyborgs (or is it just rich people who get this?). After talking briefly about Biden’s new tax proposal we break down “the slap heard ‘round the world.” Biebers involve Hulu accounts and limiting discourse.  

Direct download: 2022_03_30_0391.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by reflecting on the latest Batman movie and theorizing that the caped crusader’s identity could only be that of a rich white man. We play a couple voicemails from callers who like to listen to us talk about things we know little about, for some reason. We tackle the issue of wealth, trying to decide whether it would make life too boring, and then revisit the issue of non-monogamy. Biebers involve parking spots and Instagram filters.

Direct download: 2022_03_24_0390.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with yet another story about Christian losing consciousness, after which we briefly weigh in on the issue of doping in sports. We touch on the new Apple TV+ series, Severance, and then play a voicemail about the end times. We hear from another listener regarding the war in Ukraine, and then spend the entire second half of the show arguing about it. Biebers involve airline seats and clutter.

Direct download: 2022_03_17_0389.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with a voicemail from a grateful listener which helps convince us that this show might not suck after all. We hear a harrowing restaurant story involving someone who’s for sure related to Hitler, after which we turn our attention to the issue of “consensual non-monogamy,” discussing whether it is truly possible for married couples to adopt the lifestyle without jealousy and competitiveness (we disagree somewhat about this — guess which one of us is more cynical?). Biebers involve grocery stores and bad drivers.

Direct download: 2022_03_07_0388.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors by discussing whether pop music from 20 years ago can still pass as new today. We answer a listener’s question about the relationship between hard work and success, and then briefly weigh in on another listener’s thoughts about a supposed “afterlife” with no suffering or challenges. And then to lighten things up a bit we end the show by discussing nuclear war. Biebers involve typos and Pandora.

Direct download: 2022_03_01_0387.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by freaking out about how young we apparently still look (who knew?). We then recount some strange night terrors, after which we dive into the whole Russia/Ukraine debacle, tackling issues like whether media outlets that are funded by corporations with a vested interest in the outcome of a particular story can be trusted to be objective in their reporting about that story (hint, they can’t). Biebers involve door hangers and extortive ink companies.

Direct download: 2022_02_22_0386.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we spend some time discussing recent Superbowl Halftime show, breaking down why white Boomers are so scandalized by what they saw (cough*racists*cough. We talk about the way COVID has transformed the way we work (and the way we think about work), which leads into a conversation about the balance between busy-ness and idleness. Biebers involve masks and online ordering.

Direct download: 2022_02_15_0385.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we begin by discussing a documentary about some couple who stole a painting worth $100 million (why can’t we pull off something cool like that?), and then firm up our pledge to spend 10 minutes in meditation every day for a month. We discuss method acting and the cast of HBO’s Succession, and then reflect on the film Old Henry, asking ourselves whether anyone is worth rooting for if we knew everything about them. Biebers involve movie twists and supermarket checkout lanes.

Direct download: 2022_02_08_0384.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We take a departure in this episode from politics, current events, and the futile nature of existence and tackle some “get to know you” questions about our dreams and goals, our first jobs, our desert-island films, our best vacations, and what kind of harrowing claustrophobic situation we could endure. Biebers involve cheese and lazy web developers.

Direct download: 2022_02_01_0383.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by waxing nostalgic about Harry Potter and mocking Marvel Universe movies. We then hear from a caller commenting on last episode’s topic of mid-life crises, and then weigh in on the latest example of faux-outrage concerning how sexy M&Ms used to be and now we barely want to bang them (could it be that keeping us all divided over BS is to distract us from being constantly raped and pillaged by the billionaire class?). We decide to give meditation a shot, and then share biebers involving supermarkets and booking trips online.

Direct download: 2022_01_29_0382.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we springboard from the term “discography” into a discussion of the  fast-moving nature of tech. We recount what is perhaps the coolest fight we’ve ever had with each other (and it just happened the other day!), and then spend the second half of the show discussing depression, mid-life crises, and the looming threat of death. Biebers involve scales and clothes.

Direct download: 2022_01_13_0381.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we spend the bulk of the show looking back at 2021 and discussing our personal highs and lows throughout the year, from ER visits to restaurant openings, and everything in between. We talk (and somewhat disagree) about COVID vaccine mandates, and then share biebers involving car chases and furnaces.

Direct download: 2022_01_05_0380.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a discussion of the new film The Green Knight (we’ll let you guess which one of us has and has not seen it). We tease a voicemail about the highs and lows of 2021, which we will answer in more detail next week. We hear from a caller about the challenges of parenting, from which we springboard into a discussion of whether there’s any hope at all for kids these days. Another caller shares his own plans to leave the ministry, and then we share biebers involving boxes and undershirts.

Direct download: 2021_12_30_0379.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by discussing the new docu-series titled Voir, after which we hear from a listener in Australia who insists that his country’s claim-to-fame is that it proves the Right wrong time and again. We weigh in on a theory that the secret to a healthy marriage is non-cohabitation, and then field a few questions from a patron about the effects of our religious upbringing. We then share biebers involving chin straps and tech doing our thinking for us.

Direct download: 2021_12_16_0378.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors discussing the film Nine Days (which apparently causes people to question their entire worldview). We then turn our attention to whether the lack of photographs in old-timey days made people less vain than they are now (and by the way, how in the SHIT does photography work?). We revisit the new Beatles documentary, Get Back, and then share biebers involving snowflakes and car chases.

Direct download: 2021_12_07_0377.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by discussing the (disturbingly possible) “dead internet theory.” We turn our attention to the omicron variant, and then hear from a caller about the dangers of replacing traffic cops with cameras. We talk about the Crumbley shooting and the legal exposure of his white trash parents, and then answer another listener’s question about how our views of relationships have changed over the years. Biebers involve gristle and tea lights.

Direct download: 2021_12_04_0376.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a brief discussion about the new Beatles documentary, Get Back, and then hear a hilarious story from a patron about how our podcast led to a meeting with his work’s HR department. After watching a clip of the new Kid Rock video we discuss Bill Maher’s contrast of Greta Thunberg and Kylie Jenner. We then turn our attention to the verdict in the Kyle Rittenhouse trial and discuss the merits of the “self-defense” defense. Biebers involve toilets and shaving.

Direct download: 2021_11_27_0375.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we discuss whether the film Groundhog Day is in fact a classic, which leads us into a discussion of the black cowboys in the new movie The Harder They Fall and whether we can really trust historians. Speaking of mistrust, we break down some details of the case against Kyle Rittenhouse, and then turn our attention to Christian’s hatred of Mexico. We hear from a disillusioned listener who wonders whether there’s any hope for the have-nots (we lovingly explain to him that no, there is not). Biebers involve Facebook Marketplace and the entire fabric of our society.

Direct download: 2021_11_13_0374.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with some possible insight into why people freak the F out on airplanes, after which we learn some valuable tips on how to be a bad parent by some guy who, statistically speaking, probably beats his wife. We consider the Satanic Temple’s recent foray into the culture war, and then discuss the so-called “Greek System” (which is mostly about being a total piece of shit). Oh, and Elon Musk again. Biebers involve abbreviations and Instagram reels.

Direct download: 2021_11_06_0373.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this special episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we chat with well-known author, speaker, and former architect and leader of the Christian Right, Frank Schaeffer. We discuss his recent book, “Fall in Love, Have Children, Stay Put, Save the Planet, Be Happy”, which urges readers to rethink their understanding of Darwin’s principle of “survival of the fittest” (turns out, “fitness” may have more to do with compassion and empathy than strength and domination). A thoroughly delightful conversation with a man whose impact on us is significant, to say the least.

Direct download: 2021_10_18_0372.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a voicemail from a caller whose taste in movies is shallow enough to become bored the minute the explosions stop, and we then discuss whether parents should bring their small children on planes or just leave them in the car for the rest of our sake. We discuss all the rape in Game of Thrones, and then we turn our attention to what draws otherwise normal people to evangelicalism. We revisit the Dave Chappelle “controversy,” and biebers involve verification codes and getting tricked on Instagram.

Direct download: 2021_10_23_0371.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

This episode of DXP begins with a caller telling us about his newfound love of Screwball. Christian gets mocked for his spoiler-alert fail, and then we are asked a question about grammar. We share which three calendar years have been most significant in our lives, and why, and then spent some time discussing Dave Chappelle’s recent special, “The Closer,” addressing the claims that he is transphobic. Biebers involve reacting to texts and obliviots in restaurants.

Direct download: 2021_10_16_0370.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We kick off this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with a couple voicemails, one from a dude who’s high as shit, and the other from a woman about boobs. We hear from some people on Wacky Christian Twitter, and then revisit (one final time) the issue of anti-depressants, trying desperately to make ourselves clear (but apparently those anti-depressants are useless for helping people with their comprehension skills). We speak briefly about death, and then share biebers involving annoying tech questions and digital fire.

Direct download: 2021_10_09_0369.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we hear from a caller who raises the question of whether too much knowledge is actually a bad thing, and if taking the “blue pill” of ignorance is truly bliss. Another caller asks about what it means for our bodies to be the temple of the Holy Spirit, and then we explore the idea that correcting people’s grammar is nothing more than douchebag colonialism. We play a clip from philosopher Alan Watts about what happens when we die, and then share biebers involving virtual keyboards and Post-It Note etiquette.

Direct download: 2021_10_02_0368.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we ponder the mysterious dilemma of whether looking at a nearby reflection of something far away has any effect on a person’s near-or far-sightedness (our conclusion is that we guess we’ll never know). We touch on (ahem) whether women realize it when their boobs brush up against us, and then get some (misdirected) pushback from our prior discussion of antidepressants and mental illness. We discuss existential crises, and then share biebers involving phone calls.

Direct download: 2021_09_26_0367.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by giving the phrase “getting burnt” a whole new—and disturbing—meaning. We respond to a caller’s questions about depression and its causes and cures, and then address the latest controversy about Ivermectin as a possible treatment for COVID. We disagree about whether leftists hate America too much, and then share biebers involving cotton balls and phone calls.

Direct download: 2021_09_11_0366.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with a simple question about murder which then spirals into a depressing diatribe about the end of the world. We touch upon the new documentary about 9/11 on Apple TV+ and then briefly discuss Green Lights, Matthew McConaughey’s new memoir (he’s not quite as stupid as you’d think). We hear from Jason’s attorney about political sectarianism and segue into what it’s like to talk to a Trump supporter at a party. Biebers involve produce bags and failing at discretion.

Direct download: 2021_09_04_365.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode with a voice mail from a congratulatory caller, after which we hear from another listener with some interesting theories about coffee and capitalism. We discuss the kinds of drugs good parents take, and then turn our attention to the Netflix docuseries, “The Movies that Made Us,” spring-boarding into a discussion of our favorite decades for movies, music, and TV. Biebers involve account numbers and digital stuff trying to be analog.

Direct download: 2021_08_28_0364.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by introducing a debt collector who absolutely needs his own reality show. We hear from a caller with questions about the “Great Resignation,” the realization on the part of so many that the pre-COVID rat race has lost most of its appeal (she also wanted us to talk about softcore Bible porn). We hear an interesting take from a listener concerning the idea that there actually are no men’s sports teams, and then share biebers about bathrooms.

Direct download: 2021_08_22_0363.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

This episode of DXP boasts perhaps the funniest and most poignant first half we have ever forgotten to record. But the second half (which is now the whole thing) was also pretty good. We discuss the death of a high school friend from COVID and whether Americans are beginning to soften their anti-vax position (shockingly, the positive one of us thinks yes, the other one remains unconvinced). We briefly talk about climate change and performative activism, and then share biebers involving crosswalks and bad seventeenth-century grammar.

Direct download: 2021_08_10_0362.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP (after a brief update about the Well & Table’s progress) we explore the age-old question of whether we’d find Rachel McAdams attractive if we met her in her sixties (short answer, it’s complicated but probably). We share the recipe for the craft cocktail that became the Drunk Ex-Pastor, and then discuss the controversy surrounding the Women’s National Soccer Team’s recent Olympic loss. Biebers involve left-hand turn lanes and cell phone battery levels.

Direct download: 2021_08_03_0361.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by introducing our Summer 2021 Playlist, after which we hear from a listener who ironically faults us for repeating ourselves. We share an update about the Well & Table, and then we hear a bunch of jokes about cheese from someone who ought to know. “Dick Move, God” makes a comeback, and then we hear from a listener who ironically faults us for repeating ourselves. We break down some bad arguments about Christianity, and then share biebers involving ATM fees and auto-correct.

Direct download: 2021_07_26_0360.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with a breakdown of opening weekend at the Well & Table (Hint: It went great!). Christian then tells a dad joke that Jason doesn’t get until it is explained to him (those are the best kind of jokes). We hear from an angry caller who apparently doesn’t like comedy, and then spend the remainder of the episode debating the merits of billionaires going to space. Both biebers involve banks.

Direct download: 2021_07_19_0359.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of DXP we hear from a caller who forces Jason to remember a bunch of theology. We then discuss all the recent documentaries we plan to watch, and then briefly discuss the not-good but titillating Netflix program, Sex/Life. We turn our attention to the real reason women can’t be preachers, and then share biebers involving tortillas and the bank.

Direct download: 2021_07_15_0358.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with another update about Jason’s restaurant, and we then consider why movies from the ‘90s seem so racist. We answer a caller’s question about our music-listening tastes, and then discuss the recent controversy surrounding marijuana and the Olympics. We talk about recent developments in the Amber Heard vs. Johnny Depp debacle, and then hear from a listener on the topic of Ikea and Juneteenth. Biebers involve cardboard. Yep, cardboard.

Direct download: 2021_07_10_0357.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by lamenting the challenges caused by cripples and calorie-counting, and then get an update on the sound system at Jason’s restaurant. We circle back to Bo Burnham’s new special, Inside, and then hear from a caller about the topic of Christians constantly sharing their faith. Another caller charges one of us with being a know-it-all, and we hear from our old pal, Dick Bush. Biebers involve spices and power-hungry city officials.  

Direct download: 2021_07_01_0356.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we wonder aloud whether needing to sleep gets in the way of creativity (spoiler alert: turns out sleeping is actually kind of important. Who knew?). We hear from a caller with a very strong opinion about gender reveal parties, and then turn the bulk of our attention to the recent Bo Burnham special, “Inside.” We invite a real-life Gen Z-er, Christian’s daughter Chloe, to weigh in on the effects of the pandemic on people already struggling with depression. Biebers involve Quicken and bitches just slapping people.

Direct download: 2021_06_24_0355.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we get a much-needed update on Christian’s bidet use (!), and then break down his plan for getting Rachel McAdams to fall in love with him. We play  a few voicemails — we hear from a caller asking about tattoos, from another asking about rock bands that stand the test of time, and from another with the balls to suggest that maybe Jason shouldn’t pay his employees $500 per hour. We then lighten things up by discussing Handmaid’s Tale and Exterminate All the Brutes. Biebers involve dogs-walkers and Hollywood’s lies.

Direct download: 2021_06_17_0354.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We’re on a break this week, but thanks to Chris Hamm, we’ve got some oldies but goodies to share with you. We’ll be back next week with a new episode!

Direct download: 2021_06_13_0353.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by disagreeing about how fun roller coasters are, and then theorize about how we would handle obscene wealth. We hear from a caller desperate to convince us that we are wrong about Rush, and then hear a story about being a cat- and puzzle-person at the same time. We share some road rage stories, as well as a really good reason for Christian to own an Apple Watch. Biebers involve litterbugs and technology.

Direct download: 2021_06_03_0352.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with an update about Jason’s restaurant (and a cautionary tale involving edibles). We then hear from a caller begging us to never break up, which leads into a conversation about the way certain films and TV shows have functioned in our lives personally. We then revisit and try to clarify some things we said last week about the pros and cons of video games. Biebers involve beloved bands and Amazon packages.

Direct download: 2021_05_27_0351.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with a conversation about what would probably be the coolest job ever. We then briefly discuss cars and movies, and then talk about the ways that the pandemic is causing people to question what used to be considered “normal.” We address the charge that Jason is mean, and then we float a half-baked theory that dogs are the Caucasians of pets. We debate whether gambling is worthwhile and hear some feedback on our bidet discussion. Biebers involve divorce and Seattle’s rain.  

Direct download: 2021_05_21_0350.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by recounting an unfortunate wiping mishap, and then learn about a cool hack to get free food. We discuss Elon Musk and debate whether he’s a good guy or a cartoon villain, after which we hear from a caller with an interesting idea to grow the podcast by shrinking it by 50%. We then turn our attention to the issue of cultural appropriation and discuss whether it is even really a thing in the first place. Biebers involve TV seasons and episode spoilers.

Direct download: 2021_05_13_0349.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

Direct download: 2021_05_06_0348.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors by establishing once and for all that Ted Cruz really is a piece of shit. We springboard from the song “Jesus Loves the Little Children” to a discussion of whether it’s racist to refer to people as “red, brown, yellow, black, or white,” and then freak out that the movie Titanic came out a quarter of a century ago. We delve into prostitution (well, into a discussion about prostitution) and whether there’s really anything wrong with paying for sex. Biebers involve meat and earbuds.

Direct download: 2021_04_29_0347.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode by tackling that age-old question of whether “salt” is a legitimate flavor or not (we applied our laser-like reasoning to “vanilla” a few weeks ago as you’ll recall). We revisit the topic of polygamy, and then hear from a caller about how to solve Jason’s streaming frustrations. Christian claims to solve abortion, and then we answer another caller’s question about heartbreak over past break-ups. Biebers involve masks outdoors and that thing that put Chicago on the map.

Direct download: 2021_04_22_0346.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP with some talk about Christian’s stroke, and then naturally segue into a discussion of off-the-rack spandex jeans. Netflix’s Away leads to the topic of what we would be willing to die for, and then Jason tells a casino story about what he is definitely NOT willing to die for. We hear from a caller about proper dog training, and then launch into a discussion about polygamy and polyamory. We play a voicemail about cancel culture, and then share biebers involving form fields and streaming.

Direct download: 2021_04_15_0345.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP, surprise surprise, by talking about TikTok. We then hear from a listener about how difficult it can be doing customer service for Dominos Pizza, especially when the customer in question is a grumpy podcaster. We hear about Christian’s new cat, and Jason shares his thoughts after watching Forrest Gump with his daughter for the first time. We hear from a caller with questions about just how “squeaky clean” we used to be, and then share biebers about ageing parents and cooking sausages.

Direct download: 2021_04_11_0344.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:24pm PST

One of us had a rough week, which we break down at the top of DXP #343 (and during the discussion we come up with a way to punish appliance companies for charging too much for their shit). A caller wonders aloud what an intimate encounter (ahem) between the two of us might look like, after which we discuss the thorny issue of deepfake videos. We turn our attention to the controversy surround rapper Lil Nas X, which leads to a broader discussion about the N-word. Biebers involve (literal, not metaphorical) small potatoes and the idiocy of Washington’s street names.

Direct download: 2021_04_01_0343.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

We spend the first half of this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors discussing two controversial topics: We wrap up our conversation about whether refusing to date a trans person constitutes transphobia, and then discuss the disparity in pay between male and female professional athletes. We then briefly talk about controversial rapper Tekashi 6ix 9ine, after which we explore the issue of Gen-Z’s unorthodox career goals. We play a few voicemails in our “Stories from Church” segment, and then share biebers involving cloud-based storage and plain old vanilla.

Direct download: 2021_03_25_0342.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:58pm PST

We begin DXP #341 touching on topics like social media, comedians, and weed. We then turn our attention to the topic of mindfulness and being present in each moment (one of us is reading Eckhart Tolle, can you tell?). We hear from a listener with some thoughts on our open-mindedness, and then we tackle the question of whether not wanting to date a trans person is in fact transphobia. We talk a bit about the Atlanta shootings, and we then share biebers involving bite-sized food and doorknobs.

Direct download: 2021_03_18_0341.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

Episode #340 of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a discussion of Hulu’s new documentary series, Hip Hop Uncovered. We foray a bit into politics — we talk about ridiculously hot sex-symbol Ted Cruz, and his not-embarrassing-at-all speech at CPAC a couple weeks ago, and then speculate about whether Bernie is as pleased with the COVID stimulus bill as he claims to be on social media. We hear from a caller asking about sex-quotas within marriage, and then share biebers involving hyperlinks and painting.

Direct download: 2021_03_11_0340.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

DXP #339 begins with a discussion of men’s shorts which made us both slightly uncomfortable. We then think back on what we wanted to do for a career when we were in high school, after which we learn that one of us had an MRI this past week (one guess who). We mock Oklahoma for some reason, and then hear some voicemails about church vs. state and the mass exodus from Christianity. We explore the topics of mindfulness and meditation, and then share biebers involving credit scores and body-shaming.

Direct download: 2021_03_06_0339.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:59pm PST

We begin this episode of DXP by discussing why Jimmy Carter was the “rock ‘n’ roll president,” after which we talk about whether Jason really likes hip hop or not. The topic of ageing comes up (as it is wont to do), and we then turn our attention to whether the CPAC event was a Nazi rally in disguise. We address the gender of a plastic potato, and then Christian forces Jason to watch some TikToks in a desperate effort to convert him. Biebers involve temp checks and Starbucks.

Here are the 5 TikToks Jason watched:

Bad

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMejB5yCv/

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMejBsLsx/

 

Transition

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMejBVE1y/

 

Coffee shop

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMejBHRDR/

 

Tourette’s

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMejSe7pE/

Direct download: 2021_02_27_0338.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:56pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors with a frustrated voicemail about memes, and then discuss the epic collapse of late-stage capitalism aptly called “Texas.” Christian shares his latest thoughts on death, and we challenge one another to list the last three songs we’d like to hear if we knew we would die in 15 minutes. We hear from more listeners about their experiences within American evangelicalism, and then share biebers involving outlet malls and standing in line.  

Direct download: 2021_02_20_0337.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:27pm PST

After lamenting our worsening eyesight and overall health, we hear a harrowing tale involving vomit and a corpse. We briefly revisit the issue of tipping restaurant workers, and then we springboard from Trump’s acquittal to the issue of cynicism (about which we take a couple voicemails). We then hear from a few callers recounting their weirdest church stories, after which we share biebers involving the weather app and people who just got stabbed.

Direct download: 2021_02_13_0336.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors we display a bit of ‘80s trivia at the top of the show (didn’t ALL 6th graders watch Falcon Crest back then?). We then springboard from a caller’s views on tipping restaurant servers to a lesson on class solidarity (meaning the person making slightly better poverty wages than you is not your enemy). We talk about what we’ve been watching lately, and then discuss the issue of cynicism, its causes, its dangers, and its solution. Christian tries out a new segment on Jason without his knowledge, and then we share biebers involving car tech and slow predators.

Direct download: 2021_02_06_0335.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:57pm PST

We begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors by hearing about Christian’s recent vacation which, true to form, included a trip to the ER and an emergency surgery. We hear from a listener with some interesting (and horrible) restaurant advice for Jason, and then hear from a frustrated caller with some thoughts on the whole COVID shutdown. We break down (insofar as we are able) the Gamestop/Reddit controversy, and then share biebers involving pain and poor pronunciation.

Direct download: 2021_01_29_0334.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 6:55pm PST

Direct download: 2021_01_24_0333.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:55pm PST

Direct download: 2021_01_15_0332.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:24pm PST

Direct download: 2021_01_07_0331.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:48pm PST

After a quick debrief about 2020, we turn our attention to the all-important question of whether old-timey cowboys were turned on by lesbians or not (it’s complicated, lotta ins lotta outs). We talk about our Christmas haul, and then turn our attention to the (very American) notion of rugged individualism and its political consequences, especially during a pandemic. We touch upon the FX series A Teacher and discuss the power dynamics involved, after which we share biebers involving rap songs and noisy Teslas.

Direct download: 2021_01_02_0330.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:44pm PST

Direct download: 2020_12_20_0329.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PST

Direct download: 2020_12_10_0328.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:51pm PST

Direct download: 2020_12_03_0327.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:08pm PST

Direct download: 2020_11_28_0326.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:50pm PST

Direct download: 2020_11_19_0325.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:28pm PST

Direct download: 2020_11_12_0324.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:49pm PST

Direct download: 2020_11_09_0323.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:50pm PST

Direct download: 2020_10_29_0322.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:13pm PST