Drunk Ex-Pastors (general)
Podcast #72: Divine $h!t Happens

In our very first video-recorded episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors (courtesy of David and Kevin from the Charred Barrel Society), Jason and Christian explore the merits of a new religion called “Pastafarianism,” after which we address the “War on Christmas” and the supposedly nationwide outcry over Starbucks’ new holiday cups in particular. We then take a listener’s question about how much a potential president’s religion matters before addressing the recent terrorist attacks in Paris. We spend a fair bit of time debating another caller’s question about whether prayer really works, which leads us down various rabbit holes such as why God allows evil, what role free will plays in God’s plan, and whether biblical history really functions the way many believers wish it did. Our attention then turns to the phenomenon of non-religious people sending their children to Christian schools, which causes our resident agnostic to both bemoan his own youth while simultaneously wondering whether his own kids could use a bit more Jesus in their lives. Our “Dick Move, God” segment introduces us to someone who unfortunately seemed to experience God killing their good parent while praising the crappy one. Christian is biebered by Hollywood money, while Jason’s bieber involves having clueless followers.

Also, “Don’t worry about the vase.”

Direct download: 2015_11_14_0072.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT

Podcast #71: Virtual Friends, Counsellors, and Confessors

This episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors opens with a brief discussion of whether Time magazine’s fourth most-powerful person in the world deserves the label, after which we take a call from (and are shocked at the libido of) the world’s most brilliant theoretical physicist. We turn our attention to the irony that is Seattle’s Amazon Books superstore, which is intertwined with the topic of technology, leading us to the not-so-futuristic issue of self-driving cars and whether they’ll be as “safe” as the ones that human idiots drive. We then touch upon Bernie Sanders’s views of marijuana and the gays’ plan to make the human race extinct. After our break we discuss Australian (ex)model Essena O’Neill and her renunciation of social media, on social media, which brings up the broader topic of just how healthy it is that online forums have replaced real flesh-and-blood counselors for so many young people in our culture. In our “Dick Move, God” segment we learn how to get out of paying your debts with the help of the Spirit. Jason is biebered by the effects of changing your email address, while Christian’s bieber involves unnecessary wastes of his time.

Also, Lesbian Island? Yes please.

Direct download: 2015_11_05_0071.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT

Podcast #70: Jay Bakker Interview

In this episode the Drunk Ex-Pastors interview pastor-author Jay Bakker, “Christian agnostic” and son of Jim and Tammy Faye. We begin with a disavowal of anything we say since we do absolutely no research before weighing in on a topic, after which (to Christian’s annoyance) Jay and Jason talk about skateboarding for way too long. Jay relays his first and only experience with our former church, Calvary Chapel of Costa Mesa, which reduced him to tears (not the good kind). Jay then describes his experience becoming a gay-affirming Christian leader, which went pretty much how you would expect it to, after which he tells us about his church, Revolution. Our discussion then veers to the topic of the weakness and humanity of Christian leaders, and finally to the subject of the relationship of faith and doubt.

Also, an “Orange County accent”? Psssssh! I am so. Sure.

Direct download: 2015_10_27_0070.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:13pm PDT

Podcast #69: You're Not Gonna Live Forever (or Learn how to Fly)

This episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a heartwarming tale of “tough love,” that special brand of care that renders the phrase “kill them with kindness” all the more meaningful. We take a call from a listener demanding to know more about Jason’s life (which demand is rebuffed), and another from some guy who hates Mother Teresa and implies she was some sort of monster. We discuss one of the New Atheist’s controversial view of gun control, completely solve the riddle of reincarnation, and then tackle the issue of radical Islam. We are asked to weigh in on Justin Bieber’s wiener (which one of us has seen and the other has also seen but won’t admit it), and then take another call about the difference between Edward Snowden and Kim Davis. In our “Dick Move, God” segment we meet a grieving elementary school teacher whose students learned a valuable lesson about what happens when you damage the ego of the Lord’s anointed. Christian is biebered by people who refuse to “Feel the Bern,” while Jason’s bieber involves being forced to think about useless people.

Also: Bears, God? Really? Wow. Just… wow.

Direct download: 2015_10_17_0069.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT

Podcast #68: Slouching toward Idiocracy

In this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian discuss whether excessive drinking is really as harmful as all the experts unanimously warn (turns out it’s fine). We then discuss a recent documentary about The Shining, seeking to determine whether Kubrick was really the genius his most devoted fans insist he was, or whether those fans need to move out of their parents’ basements and do something more constructive. We take a couple brief calls about guns, as well as give some marital advice, ironically, to a caller with a conservative wife. We then turn our attention to the issue of technology’s effects on our culture, and whether democratizing the flow of information is worth how stupid it’s making us. Jason is biebered by his looming death, while Christian’s bieber involves uncharitable hermeneutical practices.

Also, cock rings? Discuss. . . .

Direct download: 2015_10_13_0068.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:02pm PDT

Podcast #67: Just Say "No" to Martyrdom

Episode #67 of Drunk Ex-Pastors begins with a brief discussion about all the ways Jason is the worst Catholic ever, but then moves on to the question of why (1) if you love guns you’re most likely an evangelical Christian, and (2) if you’re an evangelical Christian you most likely miss the entire point of everything Jesus taught. We take a call from an ex-Catholic atheist asking what the point of prayer is, which leads to the issue of why smart atheists always choose stupid Christians to engage rather than picking on ones their own size. The Roseburg shooting comes up, giving way to a discussion about whether the gunman was targeting religious people, and if so, whether it’s OK to be a religious person who lies about being religious. We then launch into our two new segments, “Dick Move, God” and “Feeding Friendsy,” the former of which tells the story of young women getting crushed to death for not being hot enough, and the latter supplies some important tips for the post-Rapture crowd who got left behind. Jason is biebered by having to waste his time patiently, while Christian’s bieber has to do with subjecting himself to idiots in the noble service of this podcast.

Also, you’re a non-practicing Jew? Hey, I’m a non-practicing virgin!

Direct download: 2015_10_05_0067.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:08pm PDT

Podcast #66: Roseburg

In this special episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors, Jason and Christian discuss the recent mass shooting in Roseburg, OR, as well as exhibit their hatred of America and freedom by daring to wonder aloud whether anything can be done about this sort of thing (and if so, what). As it turns out, plenty of things can be done (but whether we have the national will to do them is another question).

Also, small penises.

Direct download: 2015_10_05_0066.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT

Jason and Christian begin this episode of Drunk Ex-Pastors by discussing a post that Jason wrote about how a smidge of agnosticism is worth avoiding the perils of fundamentalism, after which we offer some philosophy tips to a student of philosophy (which he himself asked for, oddly enough). We then tackle listener questions about the supposedly apocalyptic blood moon and the bizarre culture of conservative Bible colleges. After our mid-show break we resume with a mid-conversation comment about “shit vs. blood,” but neither of us remembers what exactly occasioned it (and we’re not sure we want to). We discuss the recent Volkswagen scandal, and then take a call from an old favorite about the pope which, for some reason, is interrupted by our trying to list our top five favorite one-hit wonders. We then introduce two new segments called “Dick Move, God” and “Feeding Friendzy,” and both our biebers stem from the supposed need for social graces.

Also, Christian ladies? You can stop speaking now, because men are present.

Direct download: 2015_09_30_0065.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT

In this episode of drunk Ex-Pastors, we begin with a capitulation on Christian’s part toward the color-blind, and then move on to what a man’s chin and legs tell us about his sexual orientation. Jason nods his head and furrows his brow as Christian expresses his frustration over DXP’s Catholic listeners, after which we take a call from an active military listener explaining what exactly “lawful orders” are. Another caller seeks clarity on whether acting gay sends you to hell or whether just being that way is sufficient. We then share some preliminary thoughts on a documentary about the so-called “Purity Movement” (which is that thing of when earnest evangelicals have sex before marriage, but only after promising not to). The topic of open relationships arises, as does the thorny issue of Ahmed’s ticking time bomb. Oops, we mean clock. We turn our attention to the refugee crisis (noting the irony of which segment of society is embodying the “Hate Thy Neighbor” ethic), a discussion which dovetails into the issue of whether democracy can really beat theocracy in a fight. Jason is biebered by Eastern European Mexicans, while Christian’s bieber ends up focusing on the real reason his clothes don’t fit right.

Also, it really is a small world, after all. Just ask Matt.

Direct download: 2015_09_22_0064.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT

Podcast #63: Civil and Sexual Abuse of Power

In this episode, the Drunk Ex-Pastors respond to a listener’s misgivings about how we handled the Kim Davis controversy, which leads to a discussion about elected officials, civil disobedience, and what Jesus thinks about it all. Jason tries to tell a story about his dad, which Christian interrupts with something about his own father that is so poignant that it would move most normal people to tears (Jason, irritated at the interruption, politely listens until he can finish his own story). We return to porn (as men so often do), this time tackling the issue of how many boobs a person has to see before he becomes a sociopathic necrophile. Christian is biebered by Catholics who think like Calvinists, and Jason has no bieber since we ran out of time.

Also, that’s right, we forgot: YOUR WIFE’S DEAD!

 

Direct download: 2015_09_14_0063.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:00pm PDT